Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Don't try this at home

I hope everyone had a very Merry Christmas! I'm back at home in DC now and all the magic of the year is over. It was a fun vacation and really good to see my family. Now I'm into the final days of feeling something close to "normal" before I stop taking my temporary thyroid hormone in preparation for the next phase of my cancer treatment - radioactive iodine (RAI). I will stop taking the Cytomel on Saturday December 30 and start a special low iodine diet that will ensure any remaining cancer cells will absorb the RAI and be killed off. On January 9, I will go get a tracer dose of RAI so they can do a scan of my body to see where any cancer cells might be lurking. The scan is on the 10th of January. Depending on the results, they will decide how big a dose to give me. I'm really scared to go off my medicine because it will make me really hypothyroid and I don't know whether I will feel bad or not. I'm also a little worried about the scan. I hope it will be "clean" - no metastases - and I can have a small dose of the RAI. I'm so very excited for all this business of getting rid of the cancer to be over with (for now at least).

Since I started exercising again about a week and a half after surgery, I have tried to get some exercise 4-6 days a week. I've managed to do 30-50 minutes of cardio 3-4 days a week and lift weights 2-3 days. I've lost a good bit of both strength and endurance in the weight room. I haven't been able to tolerate lifting as heavily or for the same amount of time. I haven't had any rhyme or reason to my training, it's just been whatever I could tolerate at the time. Or was in the mood for.

In some way it's like a weird science experiment. I feel very detached about it all, like I'm just observing the process as my body systematically detrains. I'm getting softer and fluffier. My metabolism is slowing as my muscle mass and activity levels decline. Part of me is Really Bothered by these developments. I've never been a rail, but I was leaner prior to the surgery, and stronger. I could eat like a linebacker and maintain my weight. Now... ugh. And the other part of me? The part that is tired? Does. Not. Care. At all. We have to nurture that part a lot. It's needy and fussy.

I'm already thinking about my training plan for the 10 miler... and a new routine in the weight room... Hmmm...


Savy said...

Fitness isn't always about what you can lift or how lean your body is. What it is really about is finding balance in all aspects of our lives. People are obese because they have fallen out of balance, and they stay that way because they do nothing to correct it.

You have been thrown a major curveball, with a big bend in the road coming up right now. You ARE working out - as it fits in and makes you feel good. You are following reccomendations of your doctors. YOU have balance right now - even considering the current events.


Do not judge yourself by your reflection, but on your life and actions as a whole, OK?

maxie's pad said...

I have been through LID and RAI. If I can offer you any support, please feel free to write to me.
Following LID, getting the scan, getting the RAI treatment, like a major mountain to climb. For me, the same energy that propels me forward during my workouts, is the energy that I harness to get through this krap.
Thankyou again for sharing this journey with us on the thyroid cancer message board. I'd love to help in any way that I can. I found the process difficult, but truth be told, the support of others was really helpful in getting through this.
Now that I think of it, I was doing the drill last year at this time. I hated LID, because I don't like that feeling of deprivation that I initially had. I don't like restrictions of any type. Well, I'm okay with self imposed restrictions that I create for my own health, but even though I'm 57, I have an aspect of my psyche that is still a defiant teen who doesn't want anyone to tell me what to do. Jeeeez, sorry I've begun to blog myself when this is only supposed to be a comment.
You go girl ! You can do this. You can run throught this, climb the thyca mountain and get to the top !!!
maxine in miami